MORE ON BREWING!

And anyway, beer is 90% water, but the next time you're waiting to order at the bar, I wouldn't mention this to your landlord if I were you! So the brewers, like the petroleum companies, are just glorified tax collectors.

A really excellent bottle - conditioned real ale - which my brother-in-law and Chef John King once described as 'like drinking anaesthetic' is Brakspear Triple. At 7.2% ABV this is a real winter warmer with generous malt and citrus hopiness to be savoured on a Friday night by a roaring fire, or, in our case, woodburner. Don't drink it on any other week night as you may not be able to do your work the next day. The cheapest I've seen it is at £2.05 in Sainsbury's but my Uncle Keefe - yes, another real ale homebrewer - tells me it's available in Morrison's for less than this. Under two quid for a pint of draught beer in a bottle? - that's what I call value!

So with all this revenue coming in from exorbitant excise duty on alcohol and fuel, why are the public finances in such dire straits?

Fighting a war on two fronts. Now that does cost dear!